Home
by lilieslilacs
Summary: "Sakura was always at home, but her heart remained elsewhere."


Sakura sat under the cool three shades on a peaceful summer midday. Her back pressed against the tree bark as she leaned against it and a gracious smile curved her lips. She could feel the heat and the coolness of summer at the same time, the sound of squirming crickets, and soft echoed of punches from the training ground across. Her pale skin graced under the heat of yellow rays, giving her skin a darker shade.

She looked up to see the sky as blue as ever, one she didn't dare to imagine five years ago. Her vision was partly blocked by the tree, a clash of green and blue caught her peripheral vision, and the utmost was the orange-colored book resting on a tree branch. She quickly looked up to find her former sensei smiling and giggling under the orange-colored book. She sighed and smiled. She wondered what was so good about the book her sensei was willing to read over and over again for the past ten years.

"Kakashi-sensei?" she called. He was resting against the tree bark, sitting on the tree branch. He always had this mysteriousness, to pop up and disappear at any time. Even with her strenuous training, sensing his presence was undoubtedly hard.

"Sakura," he murmured. She noticed, when he called out her name, he always gave her a different look from the boys. A noticeably softer and gentler one, of a father-like figure watching his daughter growing up… and of course wary. Sakura has both her parents, she knows watching their daughter grow up is tough. He smiled at her and the corner of his eyes crinkled, showing how much he has aged, or were the crinkles hiding his feeling? "Having lunch break?"

"No," she shook her head. She shifted her gaze to the training ground where green grasses covered almost all the ground. She liked the green and sometimes she wondered if her eyes are as green. "Just watching my boys sparring." She shrugged and zoned out at the two figure standing across each other, she could only make out tiny dots of orange and black right now. "They overdo it a lot."

This is her new routine. Twenty-five years old Haruno Sakura became the village top medic just recently, after three more years of hazardous training under Tsunade and another full year of self-study and researches. She became a re-known top kunoichi, with her medical skills, perfect chakra-control, horrendous strength, and advanced genjutsu. Now, she run the hospital, she goes on solo missions. She's constantly in surgery and on-call in the ER. She is the busiest person alive. And her only daybreak among her hectic schedule is lunch time, where she would spend her break with her two teammates and a perverted sensei – watching them spar.

When the sound of a thousand chirping birds invaded her hearing senses, she quickly snapped out of her thoughts. Her emerald eyes focused on the two figure, still going on and on with their spar despite it being midday already. Now that they have come closer, she could see how badly beaten up they were. With harsh panting gasp and scrunched up shoulder, she could guess they've been going on and on since morning, unwilling to admit defeat. Sakura wondered if the two will ever stop fighting.

Her emerald eyes caught the sight of something spiral blue in Naruto's hand and a spark of electricity in Sasuke's. One was giant and the other was quick, both as lethal as the other. Her insides suddenly went cold and she was frozen in spot. This happened all the time, her two boys charging at each other with lethal jutsus and her stomach churned and fear rushed through her. This is the sight she has been watching again and again, but will never get used to.

A warm hand was placed on top of her smaller one and she quickly turned to see another man with paler skin. He had this cryptic smile on his face and she sighed as he settled down next to her. "Are you okay?" His once cryptic smile turned genuine and his concern was expressed very clearly. She could hear it in his voice.

"Sai! You're back!" When her nerves finally calmed down, she gave him her late response to his sudden presence. "Yeah, I'm fine." Sai was an exceptional man. This once emotionally deprived and stuck-up bastard turned sweet, gentle, caring, and very understanding. He provided a certain style of comfort to her. One she couldn't afford to lose. "And are you okay? Have you checked yourself at the hospital?"

Sai gave her a sheepish smile; she always had something about that smile – something to hate. As her vision traveled back to two fighting figure in the middle of the field, she leaned against his shoulder and pressed her eyes closed. She needed to calm down, to calm her nerves, and stopped being paranoid. She was getting better and better, still… it was hard.

She was there when her two lovely boys started to break, when they tried to kill each other. The first time everything went disarray, it was the chirping birds and spiral blue thing attacking each other. That was heartbreaking. Because the first and last time Team 7 could ever be together begin with the Chidori against Rasengan and ended with the same jutsus and twice hate. And Haruno Sakura was always stuck in the middle of everything. Those were lethal, and she'd do anything to make them live. So, when she saw them using it in a spar, despite it being less lethal to one another nowadays, she couldn't help but be afraid.

Do you know… shinobi do not have the luxury of living a long life? They faced near-death situation more than once, they sustained lethal injuries all the time. And no, they do not have the luxury of dying a luxurious death, with life flashing through their head and company of their loved ones. They died a tragic death, where they tried to cling to their life but failed miserably. Haruno Sakura had faced those countless time, each near-death situation, however, came from her stubborn boys. And more than once, they almost killed her.

There was one time, when everything finally settled down and the suicidal rate went down after the war, Sakura spent her day in luxury while watching both her boys spar. The day they almost sent her to death, if not for Kakashi and Yamato, and of course, Sai quick reflexes. Sakura may have forgotten how stronger they have got, that those lethal attacks will only cause them dreadful injuries but not death. Or maybe she was too traumatized about the past, the post-war fights, and the break of Team 7. She reacted on instincts when she heard the thousand chirping birds haunting her mind, and she ran. She ran with all her might.

The loud boom was enough to snap her out again. The heat seemed to be increasing. Her eyebrows twitched in annoyance. Her two boys will never learn. When the smoke finally cleared out, then she had the bravery to open her eyes and showed the world her emerald orbs. Sasuke was coughing out blood. She made a mental note to pummel Naruto later. She shifted her gaze to the orange counterparts; he was spurting out lots of blood. Her eyebrows twitched once more and Sai chuckled in amusement. There will be a fun show later on. The hell with liking Sasuke, she'd pummel them both.

"Kakashi-sensei…?" she called again when her sensei remained unmoving on his spot. The two of them were drained out of chakra and their injuries were too severed for this to be called a friendly spar. This was a battle to death and she'd make sure it would be her pummeling them to death. These two stubborn boys…

"Hai… hai… Sakura." He mused, still hiding underneath his orange-book.

Sakura stood up from her spot, escaping the tree shades, letting the heat burnt her skin. The two boys were going to charge at each other. A long sigh escape her lips. She didn't have all the time to heal the two of them. Someday… when she was tired of keeping up with them, she'd let them fight all day long and let them bleed to death. "Stop it, you two!" When they both ignored her, they'd learn how temperamental she could get.

A loud boom was heard.

* * *

"Ouch! Ouch!" Naruto whined, rubbing the top of his head and his butt. The training ground wasn't in one piece anymore, but battered up to pieces, courtesy of the medic pinkette. "Sakura-chan!"

"My god, I told you not to overdo it all the time and see what you've done!" she wrapped her arms in front of her chest and glared at the ramen-lover. That was one lethal look you should avoid. "You're going to kill each other and I promise I'll let you bleed out to death!" She hit him again, yet he was still smiling so foolishly. Sometimes, she wondered if Naruto just liked being hit by her. Even with her lethal gaze and sharp words, concern and wary possessed her whole being as her eyes scanned for any deadly injuries on him. When she found none, she had all the time in the world to pummel the two of them.

"And you!" She pointed sharply to the raven-haired man who was trying so badly to look cool. His head was bleeding and his ribs were cracked. His chest was covered in big bruises. Yet there he stood, hands in his pocket, eyes as cold as ever, expression stoic, and body standing tall. He was one full head taller than her; she was contemplating on how to pummel him.

This was the first time Sakura has ever yelled at him. She has been so distant lately. Sakura wrath was a sign of her care, only selected ones will receive. Yet, she never gave one to Sasuke. She always pointed a finger at him, raising her voice only the slightest, and sighed with a "nevermind". She'd walked away and dragged Naruto with his ear and heal the two of them without sparing the once-rogue a glance. And Sakura noticed… the hurt in his eyes that sometimes… sometimes… he wished she'd just hit him too.

"The hell with welcoming you back and treating you with full hospitality! You bastard with stick up your ass!" She yelled again and her two other boys were watching with full amusement. "I promise you two are going to be the death of me!" She landed a hit on Sasuke head and she almost spotted his rare smile. "Someday, I'm going to kill the two of you!" She landed another hit.

"Hn," he grumpily walked away. This was hurting his man pride, but it was nice to get hit once in a while.

"Where do you think you're going?!" She yelled again. Naruto was already whining a serenade of ouch by then. When Sasuke ignored her again, she barely avoided landing a lethal punch on his chest. She hit his head and he let her, then she dragged him by the ear, just like she always did to Naruto. "Stop acting so cool, because if you do, I'll make sure you didn't live another day."

And Sasuke was convinced Sakura strength was horrendous.

This is another part of their routine. When they finally stopped fighting, when Sakura finally stopped scolding, they'd sit under the tree shades. The boys would lie on her lap and Sakura would lean against the tree bark with Sai next to her. Kakashi dangled above them. She would press her hands on their forehead, glowing green in the process. And while healing them, sometimes her boys would end up falling asleep on her lap, and sometimes Sakura fell asleep after draining too much chakra on her boys. When that happened, Kakashi would bring the boys back home while she got back to work; or her sensei would prop them up so their body wouldn't hurt later and joined them to slumber on the tree branch. Sai… would be watching over them with warm smile, sketching and sketching.

"I don't know what boys are thinking when they spar. Especially the two of you…" Sakura spoke, still in fury but concern was clear in her crystal green eyes. "Why would you try to kill your best friend?" Maybe… the answer was simple. It's Team 7. It's the way Team 7 is… Naruto and Sasuke endless rivalry; Sakura unconditional love. Through it, they hold on. Through it, they speak.

"But Sakura-chan…" Naruto gave her another goofy grin of his. Oh, how she liked those naïve foolish grin of his. She patted his head a little and massaged his scalp. "It feels twice better if you heal us when we're all badly beaten up. It feels really cool, nice, and just… so… so… nice." He spoke and suddenly his breathing evened out. He fell asleep, oh-so-Naruto.

Being a medic, she learnt to touch and affect others chakra. She could feel their chakra, sometimes to their thoughts and feeling. Naruto chakra is warm, so happy and bright. Naruto is summer itself. His thoughts are always about the naïve or something incredibly foolish and happy-go-lucky. Sasuke chakra was cold, but now it's cool. It's cool like cold water on boiling day, a specific soothe. It's cool and mysterious; it's a long hallway with one lantern. And his thoughts… are much better these days. He no longer dwelled in regret and revenge. When she heals them, the feeling is always nice. To feel cool and warm at the same time, secure yet adventurous.

By the time Sasuke breathing evened out, she already finished healing them. The hospital work was incredibly slow today, with a new apprentice to help her around, maybe she could get some luxury sleep with her two boys and Sai and Kakashi… with her four lovely boys. There was nothing better than falling asleep on a hot summer midday, leaning against Sai, while feeling cool yet warm under the tree shades.

* * *

It was written in books, occurred in daily life, and forcefully proven by facts and sciences: how man are born protectors and woman are born to be protected. It could have been true, perhaps to ordinary civilians. But Haruno Sakura wasn't an ordinary woman, was she? She stopped being ordinary long ago. She hated being protected. It left her exposed, bare, and vulnerable – stripped off her pride and efforts. When she watched the back of her two lovely boys, a gushed of uselessness invaded her. She didn't need protection. She wanted to protect.

And… do you really think those who have gone through wars could remain ordinary? She doesn't.

The reinstatement of Team 7 was a slow process, but it wasn't hard or torturous. It wasn't as impossible as Sakura thought it would be. Naruto didn't have things going as easy as he planned them either. It was one slow process of patience and waiting. But by the time Sasuke return and the reinstatement was requested, Sakura had already coped up to a life without Sasuke (as she always had for the past years).

The Fifth Hokage didn't let him off the hook so easily. He was put under tight surveillance during his first few months. ANBU guards followed him everywhere. Then, the Fifth Hokage toyed him around by ordering him to be put under community services. Naruto pleaded and begged for the Hokage to give his rival a little leniency, yet Tsunade greatly refused. Sakura remembered a day when she was called by her shishou. She had been asked an opinion about Sasuke, her answer remained clear that day: Uchiha Sasuke was a rogue criminal, he deserved what he deserved. And so, she remembered the hurt in Naruto eyes, the surprise in Kakashi crinkles, and the disappointment in Sasuke darker orbs. Haruno Sakura was in love with Uchiha Sasuke. She would have gone through drastic measures to save him, so many wondered what happened to her. But, from the corner of her eyes, she caught a glimpse of pride and proud in her shishou's eyes.

The Fifth Hokage announced the official reinstatement of Team 7 in early October, where the green of Konoha turned scarlet. Sakura figured it was a present for Naruto. Silently, Sakura had given up on Team 7 long ago. The day she was determined to kill Sasuke was the day she gave up on bringing him back home and the unity of Team 7 was destroyed along with her dying resolve. She was surprised Team 7 could finally be one again, but none of being too happy. Yet, when she met Naruto cerulean eyes – so bright and happy, gleaming with tears –she couldn't help but cried with him. The war took a lot from them, and this was one rare occasion.

The day all of them turned twenty – 11th October – they went on their first mission together. It was a mess with hangover clouded their mind. She remembered the green turned scarlet and dead scarlet leaves on the ground. The excitement in Naruto cerulean orbs, the happy crinkles on Kakashi, the indifferent Sasuke – it was a lot to take in for her. The second mission they went off to was a B-rank, escorting the Feudal Lord granddaughter across the nation border. She showed off her skills greatly, taking down three enemies in silence.

Yet with all the skills she has displayed, her two lovely boys refused to stop protecting her. They have been arguing over and over: Sakura insisted she didn't need protection while Naruto insisted on protecting everyone, Sasuke always stood there silently. Every time her two boys jumped in front of her –acting like a shield as if she was a fragile piece of diamond – she felt left behind. She has had enough chasing and running, she has had enough of watching her two lovely boys back, and she has had enough of crying over their wounds. She didn't need protection. She needed to protect.

So, when her two boys jumped in front of her, when she got the view of their backs, she tapped on their shoulder and pressed her back against them. She was no longer watching their back, they kept each other back. She used to be a burden. She understood how burden burnt. "I'm not the same Haruno Sakura, you know," she always said again and again. Sometimes, the mere words hurt. The wars, the betrayal, Orochimaru and revenge took a lot from Team 7. Team 7 could never remain the same.

They set up a camp three miles from the border, the last safe point before raging on many unnecessary fights with rogues and bandits. Up north was the Hidden Rain Village, their main destination for their seventy-sixth mission. They've been running for three straight days, ambushed by two handy troops, and in need of a nice bath. They set up three different tents, one in which Naruto and Sasuke will share together.

"Are you okay?" Sakura quickly turned her head to see Sasuke standing inside her tent, hand shoved in his pockets and posture as indifferent as ever. But his dark orbs showed great concern for her. She smiled and took his sincerity with gratefulness. She quickly lied down on bed and patted the spot next to her, inviting him to lie down.

"I'm okay." She drapped an arm over his chest, one hand sneaked to his hair as her hands trailed down to his neck, massaging the spot near his curse mark. It always lulled him back to sleep. Her touch, sometimes warm and other cool, always soothing and nice. "I got scratched on my cheek. It only took me three seconds to stitch it back. No poisons at all."

"Sakura…" do not get hurt again. She knew he wanted to say it, in the way he called his name. They both also knew Sakura hated being protected. "Be a little more careful next time."

"You two are idiots. You guys can fight off the enemy and bleed out to death, but I can't even get a tiny scratch on my cheek?" She mused. "I'm an expert medic, I know what I can take and how to flush poisons out of me… but you two… are helplessly dead without me."

But Haruno Sakura understood the urge to protect. It was there, flowing in every shinobi veins. Shinobi are passionate, to kill and to love. They are tainted with passion. Shinobi aren't greatly kind or respectable, they are low and tainted – kill in an instant. A silent kill proves a shinobi skill, but evident to a cruel heart. Haruno Sakura wasn't a twelve-years-old genin anymore. She is a jounin now with medical expertise. She heals with delicacy, love greatly, yet deadly. She wasn't pure and innocent, she was tainted.

"Hn," Sasuke answered shortly. His answers were always short and rather mysterious. One couldn't pin-point the meaning behind his words. "I… you hit me… two weeks ago." He hesitantly brought up the topic. Outside, she could hear the constant dripping of the rain.

"I did…" Sakura murmured as she continued to massage the spot near his curse mark. She drew circles around it, clearly aware of how much he enjoyed the simple gesture. "Why… are you going to whine like a child because it hurt?" She chuckled, teasing him was fun. He draped an arm around her fragile figure and buried his nose in her hair as he softly shook his head.

This was a routine by now. He'd come to her bed and slept with her, especially on nights when his nightmare was harsh. "Do you still have bad nightmares?" She asked again and he silently murmured about getting there. "You look happier these days, you know."

"Yes," he exhaled as her breath brushed against his neck. His breath was cool and calm, while hers was a bit warmer. "You look better these days too."

Haruno Sakura is the busiest ninja around. She worked longer hours in the hospital, took her day off on shifts and self-study. She enjoyed keeping her hands busy. It kept her loneliness at bay and flushed out the ill of vanity. There were two things she couldn't stand greatly: vanity and waiting. She has wasted a handful of time waiting and crying.

When she took a break from everything, horrible feeling faded into her. The loneliness set in from the lack of noise and company. The vanity faded in when her two healing hands remained idle. When her two tiny hands didn't glow green, she wondered what other use she could have been good for. And often, with so much feeling bursting inside, she grew to hate herself for crying. So, she worked and worked and fell in love with work.

Sasuke hated that and Naruto was greatly concerned about her health. She constantly looked tired and sluggish. And one day, she collapsed after four-hours of surgery. It left her bed-ridden for days, useless in many ways. She couldn't even go to the bathroom on her own. And then, it all set in, bursting inside her. It burnt her and ate her alive: the loneliness, the vanity. She cried. She cried greatly and she hated herself.

The loneliness and vanity that faded in the week was much more than all the feeling that overwhelmed her in the past three years. She started taking care of herself since then: eating the right amount of food, taking the good amount of rest, exerting a healthy amount of chakra.

"What's going on between you and Sai?" Sasuke asked as he pressed his eyelids closed. He liked the feeling of her palm on his forehead, cool and light. "He always send you messages." He added when he felt a painted mouse climbing over.

"Friend. He's a good friend and a teammate I greatly respect and adore." Sakura answered. Sai was a replacement, an annoying one at the beginning, but one very good friend at the end. He was a member of Team 7, more than just a replacement. A man who have grown so much over the years. "I asked him to send me those messages. I need to make sure I'm not going to lose anyone else." The war and his betrayal took a lot from her.

He grunted another "Hn" and Sakura let out a gleeful giggles. Upon his return, many were new and rather unfamiliar. Naruto and Sakura closeness was in a different level of friendship and intimacy. Sai was someone Sakura greatly adore and love, she took comfort in him and his understanding. And in those many unfamiliar things, questions remained unasked, and answers remained unsaid.

There was a thing or two Sasuke would like to ask, another handful of thing Sakura would like to confirm. But they both stayed quiet. Haruno Sakura wasn't naïve anymore. Some of the broken bonds will remain broken and some wound may never close. That much she understood. The day she gave up on Sasuke was the day Haruno Sakura changed –today she reflected nothing of a person he once knew. She is level-headed, temperamental, intelligent, and greatly rational.

"The world is painful, Sasuke. It's easier to be naïve and believes for the best, but the pain came back twice as hard. When I think rationally, everything hurts bit by bit… but the world seems more bearable." She once told him.

"How do you feel about me?" It was a question he hadn't dare to ask, despite the intimate nights the two often spent. Her in his arms and the comfort he took in her gentle touches. "I would like to know," he urged her and hopefully it wasn't too fast.

She chuckled, but it didn't scare him. She didn't sound sad or hurt, she sounded happy. With his eyes closed, he could picture her brilliant eyes gleaming with something old and nostalgic. It looked brilliant and beautiful. "I love you, Sasuke." She mused, "And I love Naruto, too." And a longer silence before he buried his nose in her soft pink hair. "I love you, Sasuke, in a different way."

Haruno Sakura wasn't ready to be in love again. When she gave up on him that day, she gave up on love. She stopped believing in love and she led a selfish life. And then, everything was a flash of black and white: the destruction of Konoha, the war, his return, the death, the victorious, and his departure. She still remembered the feeling of winning a war. It wasn't great, it was sad and sick. She counted on those she failed to save. A part of her was broken and may never be fixed again.

She was nowhere near ready to be in love. She was battered to pieces, still finding her way back to who she truly is. She couldn't brace herself for another blow, for another heartache. If she was to break again, she didn't think she could pick up broken pieces of her and stuck them together. Konoha may have been rebuilt so wonderfully, but the war warriors remained wounded. So now, she'd settle and salvage what she could. This much… this much… would suffice.

Right now, Haruno Sakura is in love with her work.

"Could you move over to your side for a bit?" Sakura shifted closer to his side and he complied. He moved over the bed edge, leaning on his side so there will be more space for her. "I think Naruto will arrive in less than five seconds." She chuckled as he grunted another groan.

Four seconds later, Naruto came in screaming obnoxious obscenities at the sight of his two teammates sleeping side by side. He crashed on to the empty space next to Sakura. "He came to check on my tiny cheek scratch. So caring of him." Sakura explained and rolled her eyes in annoyance.

She quickly shifted. It was a cold night. Naruto was warm like wonderful sunshine in August and Sasuke was cool like the breezes in spring. She draped an arm over Naruto midsection and snuggled deeper, ignoring the annoyed grunts of Sasuke. Naruto screamed victory as he squeezed her in his arms.

"Pray for warmer nights, Sasuke. I'm all yours by then." She teased as she drifted off to sleep.

This was a routine that began somewhere between Winter and Spring, between Christmas and Spring Festival. Team 7 moved to a three-story house, after Naruto endless whining of lonely winter nights and Sakura concerned over Sasuke worse nightmares. And since then, it was a routine for the two of them to crash at Sakura's bed at midnight. Usually, Naruto with his goofy grin and Sasuke after a bad nightmare.

She felt like a mother, so in love with her two lovely boys and so loved by her boys. They clung to her like how babies would to their mother. She was buried in the comfort of protecting and protected, of the cool and warm, of being with her two teammates. It's nice. It's so nice.

Often, they'd wake up without Sakura sandwiched between them. Sai often took her place with his cryptic smile scaring her two baby boys in the morning. Or sometimes, she'd let them sleep together and woke up in the horror of tangled together. But right now… sleeping between them made her feel loved and happy.

Her lovely boys. Her two lovely boys.

* * *

What is home?

It was a question she has dwelled on for so long. To many, home means a place where their loved one lives. To others, it's a place where harmony and peace unites in sincerity and silence. If you asked her, then she didn't have any home other than Konoha. Konoha was where she was born, where she grew and lives, where she lost her precious ones and gained more friends. Konoha was where her friends lived, where her story was written. Konoha was home.

She has never left Konoha. Her mission has always been short, somewhere around the Fire Country. The only chance she crossed the border was on a mission to Suna, although these days she left Konoha almost every other days. Still, she never stayed long enough to find another home. Unlike her two lovely boys, she has never left Konoha.

Yet Konoha lacked something. For a home, it lacked comfort. It lacked harmony and peace. It lacked the familiarity and fullness. Konoha didn't feel full. At some point, she'd found her hometown empty, despite the bustling civilians and the overcrowded market. Konoha lacked something to fill her. Konoha didn't feel like a home anymore.

She was thirteen when all hopes of coming back home were thrown out of the window. The night Sasuke left Konoha was the moment she stopped living in a home. She has meant it – what she said to him that day, about him leaving and her solitude, about her losing everything without him. She was only thirteen, yet she was big enough to love and to understand it. She was an incredible being when it came to unconditional love.

Today marked her twenty-sixth birthday.

Her twenty-sixth birthday, thirteen years after she lost home, seven years after the war ended, five years after Sasuke return, two years after Team 7 reinstatement.

In those thirteen years, she lost her home.

Haruno Sakura was a graceful kunoichi who many man adored and many woman admired. She was beautiful and delicate, but deadly and sharp at the same time. But little do they know, the beautiful was broken and bruise. She has always been home, in Konona, but her heart remained elsewhere. Her soul silently wandered, searching for a home.

Sakura took her pride in her solo-missions. She executed her missions flawlessly, quick and through. She was cautious and careful. Her flawless record was her pride, along with her medical skills and her 100 Healing Jutsu. She enjoyed taking her solo missions, to acknowledge her skill and exceed expectation, to test and expand her limit. A sense of satisfactory, of being full and finally worthy always washed through her. But finding her way back home after a long mission wasn't an easy task.

Just like today, as she traveled through the green forest at dawn, she wondered about home and all about home. The spring breeze died down at dawn, she would like to come home before the sunrise and settled in the Hokage Mountain to watch the twilight. It always gave her comfort and firmness in confusion.

But really… what is home?

She understood how she lost home when she was thirteen. To many, family means the world. Family is home itself. But to shinobi, home is more than a family. Home is a team: sensei and shishou, teammates and classmates, then the handful family is considered a gift. Sakura understood how losing Sasuke meant losing her home. Yet, even after his return, Konoha lacked the fullness of home.

When she saw Ino on a busy shopping day, she'd be happy. When she saw Naruto eating at Ichiraku's, she'd be so glad and pleased. When she saw Team 8, she'd miss Asuma. When she saw Team 10, she'd wonder about Kurenai's child and feel gleeful when she saw the baby. When she saw Tsunade, she'd feel grateful. When she saw Team 7, Sai, and Yamato, there'd be comfort and happiness and warm. But each day she came home exhausted, she woke up twice worse.

Konoha lacked something and she'd like to find a home. On her twenty-sixth birthday, she'd like to settle down and quickly find her home. Thirteen years was a long time to endure.

Her youth was wasted on Sasuke. Her youth was wasted by wars and destruction of Konoha. Her home was often destroyed and rebuild, yet home was never home to begin with. As she traveled closer to Konoha's gate, she wondered if coming back home would bring so much agony inside. Being with her two lovely boys was everything she has ever wished for, it brought her so much happiness and comfort, yet not a home.

Haruno Sakura desired a home.

She leaned against a tree bark when her foot started to hurt from so much walking. Her chakra was depleted and it all lulled her to sleep. But she'd like to be home before the sunrise. She'd need to see the twilight from the Hokage Mountain to sooth away her trouble.

"Sakura…" a voice whispered through the darkness of the dawn, right before she fell asleep. She snapped her eyes opened and pulled out a kunai on instinct, but quickly shoved it back to her pockets and let out a smile. "Yamato-sensei," she grinned, "what are you doing?"

"Escorting you back home," he answered with gentleness. Kakashi was gentle in his ignorant ways, while Yamato-sensei was a bit warmer and much friendlier. "Don't you want to be back home soon?"

Sakura silently grimaced. Home, she didn't even know if Konoha was home. "Yes," she whispered tiredly and rubbed her eyes to push away the sleepiness. "It's been a long time, Yamato-sensei."

"It's been a long time, Sakura," he smiled. Something about his smile made her miss dad and Kakashi. "I take it you are doing well?" Sakura nodded as they leap from tree to tree. In half an hour, she'd be sitting at the mountain, watching the sunrise. "I'm proud to be your teacher."

"I'm proud to be your student too." Sakura giggled.

When she traveled alone, everything felt empty and tensed. Days took longer hours to end. Nights were spent half-asleep with her constantly on guard. There were times when she wished to be away from others. But her youth was spent with so much loneliness that she preferred hanging out with others. Sai would constantly accompany around, her life-style never failed to amuse him.

She arrived home five minutes before the sunrise and rushed to the mountain without much word. Yamato chased after her, confused by her sudden rush. She sat on the Third head, legs crossed and shoulder somewhat scrunched. It was the best spot to watch the sunrise. She'd need it, badly.

"You miss home that much, huh?" Yamato smiled as he leaned against a tree. She miss home, yes, but Konoha stopped being home long ago. Today… she almost didn't find her way back home.

She was almost lost.

The sky was a beautiful mixture of indigo blue and purple, a splash of pink in the clouds, and a bright blush of yellow and orange. The spring sun glowed with bright yellow, it was round and huge, and warm. Her pink cheek was flushed by the warmth. Her skin tingled under it.

"Happy birthday, Sakura." Yamato congratulated and Sakura threw him a beautiful smile. But the best smile of Haruno Sakura didn't come in form of beautiful smile; it came from a sincere one. Her sincere smile… with brilliant sparkles in green eyes and some toothy grinned.

"Thank you, Yamato-sensei."

"Hey, Forehead! Happy birthday!" Ino voice was loud and clear, with obnoxious curses at the beginning. Nevertheless, she stood and turned around, giving her best friend a round of thanks as they hugged. Shikamaru was next to her, murmuring something about cakes and birthdays being troublesome while Chouji was eager to cut some cakes.

But what she saw next surprised her.

Rookie 11 was there. She saw Lee and Tenten and Gai. Lee dressed in green, congratulating her and confessing his never-ending love. She liked Lee, greatly. She saw Hinata and Kiba and Shino. Akamaru was wiggling his tails and jumping around her. Next, she saw mom and dad, holding her birthday cake. Kakashi was there too, his gift was a copy of Icha Icha Paradise. Naruto stood there with a bowl of ramen as his gift and Sasuke next to him.

She received a chorus of happy birthday. Enough to make her happy, but not enough to make her feel home.

And Tsunade who was slightly drunk stood next to Shizune, holding onto Tonton. The Fifth Hokage was more than just a shishou to her, she was a mother. Tsunade was closer than her mom, more understanding, harsh but caring. She took her as an adult, she didn't baby her. Tsunade acknowledge Haruno Sakura as a kunoichi. And she stood, with so much dignity and pride as a Hokage, and proud of having a wonderful apprentice.

Sakura's back was warm with the soft glow of the sun. Her slightly longer hair bounced and blown by the wind. The soft curls of the pink hair against her cheek. Her eyes glowed with expectation to what Tsunade would say. Tsunade has never welcomed her home. She has never joined the celebration of Sakura's birthday, except for a couple of drink. But she always knew the right moments and the right words.

"Welcome home, Sakura."

And Sakura figured this is home… where Naruto and Sasuke fights to no end, where her friends live, where her shishou is the Hokage, where her mom and dad live, where Kakashi-sensei and Yamato-sensei watch over her, where Sai stands in the corner to sketch everything.

As the sun rise higher behind her, the warm was comforting. Konoha was never full, but right now… she felt home. She felt full. Kakashi and Naruto was home. Mom and Dad was comfort. Ino and Rookie 11 was peace and harmony. Sasuke was a missing piece of home. But this… is home.

"I'm home."


End file.
